Why is losing weight so difficult today (and It's not your fault
the weight, the “set point,” and the body's survival instinct
Many people always ask themselves the same question:
"Why does it take so much effort for me to lose even just two pounds?,when it used to be much easier?
Do I have a slow metabolism?"
The honest answer is: yes and no, but not in the way they've always explained it to you.
To understand it, we need to introduce a key concept that is almost never explained well:
the body weight set point.
The body loves balance: the principle of “weight of reference”
Our bodies are designed to maintain a constant internal balance, called Homeostasis.
A simple example:
- body temperature is regulated by the hypothalamus around 97.7–98.6 °F
- whether it goes down or up, the body reacts immediately to bring it back there
Body weight works in a similar way.
The brain (specifically the hypothalamus and endocrine system) has a sort of “safety zone”: a weight it considers suitable for survival based on internal and external conditions.
This is what is called a set point in English.
In Italian, we could define it as “biological reference weight.”.
When the body is under stress, fat becomes a strategic reserve
If the body perceives a state of chronic stress, for example:
- inflammation
- metabolic problems
- psychological stress
- poor sleep
- tired mitochondria
- Dysfunctional hormones
enter a very precise mode: survival.
In this mode:
- Fat reserves become precious
- the body doesn't want to “waste them”
- Basal metabolism slows down
- The brain signals the thyroid to work less This is why your metabolism temporarily “slows down”: your body wants to conserve energy for repair, not burn it to give you a boost.
- testosterone in men it lowers
- Muscle mass is not built
- Energy is conserved, not invested
From a biological standpoint, it's perfectly logical: the body believes it's in a dangerous period, so it defends itself.
Yes, you can still lose weight... but at what cost?
In this state, a person can lose weight:
- eating less
- working out more
But the experience will often be this:
- constant fame
- Chronic fatigue
- Irritability- disturbed sleep
- cold
- drop in motivation
- loss of not only fat but also muscle
- Losing even a few pounds feels like an Odyssey.
- Every pound lost feels like a Herculean labor.
In these conditions, losing weight can feel like having to climbing a mountain with a 50 kg ballast tied to you on, with weights on the ankles and wrists, and a sled loaded with iron to drag behind. You can also reach the top, but the The physical and mental cost is enormous.
And this is where frustration arises:
"How is it possible that it costs me so much, while others lose weight without even thinking about it?"
The answer isn't willpower; it's the body's internal state.
The car analogy: when pushing makes it worse Problem
Imagine your body as a car; if the engine is damaged, you might as well:
- step on the gas
- increase the RPMs
- force the gear
The car will keep going, but you'll make the damage worse.
Sometimes the smartest choice isn't to push harder, but to stop, put it in neutral, and repair the engine.
This doesn't mean “do nothing,” it means change strategy.
The body is not broken: it is extraordinarily intelligent
There's a fundamental truth that needs to be stated clearly:
The human body is neither lazy nor flawed.
It is a powerful biological machine, with enormous adaptability and regeneration capabilities.
If they don't lose weight easily, there's always a reason. And that reason makes sense from a survival perspective.
Nature rarely makes mistakes. When something isn't working, it's protecting something else.
Sometimes, to move forward, you need to take a step back
Many people try to:
- lose weight
- build muscle
- improve your fitness
while the body is still in a state of alarm.
In these cases, the real breakthrough comes when you do this:
- reduce stress
- improve sleep
- boost your metabolism
- repair mitochondria
- restore hormonal balance
When the body feels safe, something surprising happens:
- the weight set point begins to shift the body Wants to lose weight, and the weight loss works almost automatically
- metabolism reactivates
- Weight loss becomes fluid
- Muscle mass grows back
- energy increases
Not because “you tried harder”, but because the body stopped defending itself.
It's worth stating emphatically:
It's not true that people in overweight or those who struggle to lose weight less disciplined, less consistent or less attentive to detail than those who are already thin or in shape. On the contrary, in many cases they are among the most disciplined of all.
They often follow routines that most people couldn't even conceive of:
Frequent workouts, extremely controlled diet, constant sacrifices, entire days lived with little energy but without giving up.
Many would have stopped months earlier.
Some wouldn't even be able to get out of bed maintaining such a strict and exhausting regimen.
When, despite all this, the weight doesn't come down easily, It's not a lack of character.
It's a sign that the body is resisting, not because he is “lazy,” but because he feels threatened and is trying to protect himself.
Discipline is not lacking here; it's the biological system that is not yet in a condition to allow it to function.
What can you concretely do to get out of this situation
Without magic formulas, but with biological common sense:
- stop living in constant extreme deficit
- Prioritize sleep
- reduce chronic stress- move intelligently, not punitively
- Nourish the body with adequate protein and micronutrients
- give the system time to repair itself
When the body goes from “surviving” to “living,” you can step on the gas again, and this time it will respond.
The final message
Losing weight is not a battle against the body.
It's a collaboration with its biology.
If today it costs you more effort than yesterday, it's not because you've gotten worse, it's because your body is asking for repair before transformation.
Listening to it is not a surrender, it is the beginning of true change.
If the body defends its weight because it feels threatened, the right question isn't “how can I force it to lose weight?”, but: “What can I concretely do to help him feel safe again?"
This is where some practical, nutritional, and environmental choices come into play, which aren't about pushing the body, but about changing the message it receives.
🔹 Highest quality proteins (MAP)
Metabolic repair requires protein.
Not “many”, but high quality and easy to use.
The MAP they provide all essential amino acids in an extremely efficient form, with very little digestive burden.
They are especially useful when the body is under stress, eating little, or struggling to recover:
They help flag security, not scarcity.
🔹 Real food, simple, unprocessed
The body recognizes the natural food.
Meat, fish, eggs, fruit, vegetables, good fats: fewer ingredients, less metabolic stress.
That being said, today:
- The soils are less rich in minerals
- Food travels a long way
- Vitamin E and micronutrients degrade over time.
For this reason, even with a “perfect” diet, some deficiencies can occur. The
the most common is magnesium deficiency. .
🔹 Magnesium: The Mineral of Biological Safety
The magnesium It is involved in over 300 enzymatic reactions, many related to:
- energy metabolism
- Muscle function
- Nervous system
- stress management
A good magnesium intake helps the body exit a state of chronic alarm and enter recovery mode.
It is one of the micronutrients most often useful for those struggling to lose weight despite great efforts.
🔹 Light, circadian rhythm, and photobiomodulation, the signal that tells the body “you can recover”
The body makes metabolic decisions not only based on food, but also based on light.
Light is one of the most powerful biological signals that exist.
- Natural light in the morning → report “day, activity, safety”
- Darkness in the evening → allows the nervous system to slow down and the body to enter repair mode
When This rhythm is being respected, the body:
- sleep more deeply
- Recover faster- reduces internal stress
- defends fat reserves less
In this context, even small tools can make a big difference.
Blue light filtering glasses in the evening help protect the circadian rhythm, promoting melatonin production and deeper, more restorative sleep.
Better sleep means more recovery, less stress, fewer emergency signals.
Photobiomodulation (red and infrared light) acts even deeper:
directly supports mitochondria, improves energy production, and accelerates cellular repair processes.
It's like telling the body, “No"You are in danger. You can repair instead of defending yourself.”.
When nighttime recovery improves, everything else often improves as well, including metabolism.
Try!
Can you tell me...
Thank you still and always for your time.
Warm regards,
Oliver
English 
Italian 
German 
Excellent article, thank you. The concept of “collaboration with our biology” is very motivating.
Thank you very much for the comment 🙂
Thank you so much for the clarity and simplicity with which you bring us such important concepts for well-being.
Good morning Oliver, I am implementing all these tips, except the meal replacement powders because I already meet my protein quota with food, and infrared light because I don't have it, and I've noticed that my psychophysical state is improving more and more. Thanks to your wonderful family…
Umbrella
I'm very pleased to hear you say that.
I've been following you for a while, and you give truly excellent advice. Lately, I haven't been able to follow it. My mind is struggling, and I think it's because I'm not accepting my health conditions well: Crohn's disease, severe osteoporosis, a neurostimulator in my back due to irreparable damage, and most recently, fibromyalgia.
But there's one thing I need to make a change, and I want to and have to follow her for me..thank you
It's completely understandable, with what she's going through. She shouldn't be hard on herself: the important thing is to do what she can, without stressing about what's not possible today. Even small steps count.
I fully agree with everything. However, the problem remains, because sometimes you need someone to take you by the hand and make you follow the path, but we don't always find the right person to guide us, and especially we ourselves are not always open to new changes that force us out of a zone that we think is “safe.”.
I completely agree. That's precisely why I believe the main value of a personal trainer or someone guiding you isn't just the workout itself, but being a constant presence: someone who keeps you on track, supports you through difficult times, and helps you not give up, especially when it's easier to stop or retreat to your “comfort zone” on your own.
Thank you Oliver for your writing ability, you explained these concepts in a scientific way, with simplicity and clarity 👍
Thank you very much for the nice words
I'm very pleased, thank you very much!
Great, thank you!
Thank you
Thank you for this interesting information
Thanks so much for reading them :)
Thank you very much; I will try to put your advice into practice.
I'm glad I could be of some help, and thank you.
Thank you for sharing your knowledge with us!
Thank you for listening to them and spreading them.
Good morning, I'd like to place an order for some products but I can't find the maps, why is that? Thank you
Hello Susanna, I'm sorry for the inconvenience, the link below should take you directly to the MAP website:
https://www.amino-map.com/it/negozio/
You can copy and paste it.
Very interesting. But the location and method for infrared treatments are not clear to me. Who should I contact? Thank you.
Hi Michela, thank you for your question, it's very relevant. In reality, you don't need to be an expert or do complicated things. Exposure to infrared light is natural for our bodies and has always been part of our biological environment. The simplest source is the sun itself: infrared light is present throughout the day, but at sunrise and sunset, it is particularly beneficial because the infrared component is well present while UVA and UVB rays are absent or minimal. For this reason, even people with fair skin can safely expose themselves during these times, for example at sunrise and for about an hour afterward, or at sunset and in the immediately preceding phases, without risk of sunburn or skin damage. It's a light that interacts with our biological clock and signals a state of safety and regulation to the body, which is also useful on a metabolic level.
If you don't have the opportunity to expose yourself to natural light regularly, there are specific red and infrared light devices. In this case, the principle is simple: you choose a suitable lamp or panel, expose yourself at the distance recommended by the manufacturer, and for a duration that depends on the objective. It can be for general use for well-being, recovery, and metabolic support, or for more localized use on the skin, to stimulate collagen and skin tone, or even for muscle and joint discomfort, possibly increasing the duration or frequency on the affected area, always without forcing. It is not an aggressive therapy, but a biological signal that the body recognizes.
In summary, infrared light is not something artificial or strange, but a signal that we have been in contact with throughout evolution. Exposure to natural light at the right times or using appropriate devices is simply a way to recreate a context of safety and recovery, especially during periods of chronic stress.
Thank you very much for this further insight.
Very clear and comprehensive.
Thank you
I'm very glad the message was clear, thanks to you.
Thank you
Thank you
Thank you Dr. Tomasi, always clear in your scientific dissemination and attentive to the female universe 🙏🏼
Dr. Oliver, I've read everything you've written, and I saw myself in it. I've been overweight since I was 6 years old, and now that I'm 51, I continue to struggle with losing weight and regaining the starting weight. Thank you for making me understand that I'm not wrong. But where do I start again? You are fantastic. Thank you ❤️
Dear Ilaria,
I am grateful for your comment, as I created the newsletter for everyone, but especially for people in similar situations. Often, the weight loss process is simplified to “eat fewer calories and burn more,” and if you don't succeed, it means you weren't “strong and disciplined enough,” a concept that is often incorrect. The body is an extraordinary marvel of nature, and if we don't get in its way and if we work with it, not against our biology, then it is capable of achieving extraordinary and incredible feats; feats that we might have thought were only possible in movies or during adolescence/early youth.
Very clear, enlightening, and comforting.
His words, hardly pronounced by a doctor.
You speak with the gentleness of a sincere friend and the knowledge of an enlightened doctor.
Thank you, these words are an excellent suggestion for a more conscious restart
Dear Gloria,
Thank you for your touching words, which have moved me and give me the motivation to apply myself even more, so that I can help and advise as many people as possible.
Good morning
I would have liked to do the soft map diet, but then when I saw the video, I realized it was for weight loss
And luckily, I don't need it.
I am 167 cm tall and weigh 57 kg, and I am 71 years old. Everyone says I look at least 10 years younger.
I go to the gym almost every day for Pilates, yoga, dance, and strength training, as Dr. Cristina says.,
I can confirm that eating well, as you recommend, pays off. I've never eaten processed foods in my life except sporadically. Very few simple sugars, and I've completely cut them out for some years now, and those extra 13 pounds I had have disappeared.
My exams, not the usual ones, but the more specific ones, are perfect according to my gynecologist, who, like the doctor, has a holistic view of my body.
And then I consider important the awareness that what we do for our bodies is an act of love towards ourselves and also towards others.. because if we get sick we become a burden to those close to us and we become whiny and burdensome..
If we feel good about our bodies, we have physical and mental energy.
I also walk a lot.. we have a beautiful park along the Po River here in Turin.. I walk in the mountains and by the sea when I can travel.
I'm also combining many of your supplements... magnesium, B complex.
Vitamin C and an excellent omega 3.
The quality of supplements also makes a difference; I also started with Map.
Thank you for all the information you give us, it is a source of reflection and encouragement to take ever better care of ourselves.
P.S. I was a child who ate very little and zero sweets. I believe this created some kind of memory in my body. I did the same with my son.
Mothers should think about their children's future and not give them snacks.
Absolute trash to send to Mars 😂
Thank you
Silvia
Dear Silvia,
I'm very pleased to read your message, as I can feel all your energy and vitality. Although 71 years is a significant age, it's clear that you've kept your spirit, body, and especially your mind young, from which everything stems. You are truly an inspiration, and I hope to be able to maintain my energy like you. Keep it up, and you'll see that nothing will ever stop you.
Oliver
Thank you Oliver, clear and precise. I'm trying.
Thank you so much. It’s important to keep in mind that this is a marathon, not a sprint. In other words, you don’t need to go at 100% all the time—the important thing is not to give up and to keep going at your own pace. If you don’t give up, step by step you’ll inevitably reach the finish line and complete the marathon healthy and strong, without being completely worn out, because you haven’t put your body under chronic stress.
Thank you for this contribution, it's very interesting. I hadn't thought about this aspect of the weight loss problem that is bothering me. However, getting down to practical matters, especially regarding supplements, we know that they are not all equal in quality. Therefore, I ask, if possible, which MAPs and which magnesium to use: type, brand, dosage, etc. Thank you in advance and best regards. Roberta.
Dear Roberta,
Thanks for the message.
Regarding MAPs, there is only one original product, which can be purchased on the Top Life Project website under “amino-MAP”.
Here is the link to the MAPs: https://www.amino-map.com/it/negozio/
The dosage depends on height, weight, goal, and protein intake. When I'm in a fat loss phase, I use up to 40 MAPs per day, because: 0.4 MAPs per kg of body weight cover protein needs; and since I weigh between 90kg and 100kg: 90 x 0.4 = 36; 100 x 0.4 = 40. This way I'm sure my body has all the amino acids it needs and doesn't have to break down muscle mass to cover any deficiencies.
If someone can already largely cover their protein needs, they can safely take 5-20 MAPs (depending on their needs and goals) to provide the body with all the building blocks for repair, regeneration, and growth.
There are many good options for magnesium, and it's not correct to say there's only one “right” one. That said, if I had to choose, my main criteria would be the simplicity and cleanliness of the formulation. A good magnesium supplement should primarily contain magnesium in a well-absorbed form and, ideally, very few other ingredients, preferably natural ones. Many products on the market use excipients like magnesium stearate or silica, not because they benefit the body, but to facilitate industrial production, prevent powders from sticking to machinery, or make the process faster and cheaper for the manufacturer. Personally, I tend to avoid them when possible.
For this reason, if I have to recommend a product, I prefer magnesium without unnecessary excipients, designed more for the body than for the production line. This is also the criterion by which our magnesium was formulated: few, essential ingredients, and maximum attention to the quality of the raw material.
This is the link for magnesium: https://toplifeproject.com/prodotto/mag-4/
Hi Oliver
Thank you, I will put it into practice and let you know.
Good work
Thank you very much Cinzia. Good job to you too 💪
Thank you, Dr. Oliver
Thank you
Enlightening!!!🥳🥳🥳
I'm glad you enjoyed it 😊
Thank you Oliver! It's always a pleasure to read you! Vittoria
Thank you so much, Vittoria!!! I'm very happy!
Good morning Dr. Tomasi, I've been following you with pleasure for about two years. I read the article published above. I am 61 years old, 160 cm tall, weigh 65 kg, and entered menopause at 43. For work, I am out of the house for 10 hours a day. I try to avoid sugar as much as possible (my mother is diabetic) and eat healthy food, but I am not losing weight, quite the opposite...
The movement is reduced to walking 5/6 km twice a week.
True! I'm on a not-strict low-carb diet, but I've achieved extraordinary results without even realizing it.
Terrific Ivano, I'm so happy for you!! That's exactly how it should be, keep it up 💪
Thank you for the valuable advice, the difference between time-wasters and true professionals is all here!
Good morning, thank you for the information. I've been in this situation for years with diets and I'm not losing weight. 😮💨
Very, very interesting, perfect and simple summary of what Dr. Tomasi often explains.
Illuminating and exhaustive, clear and precise. Truly competent and passionate. Much to reflect on and... act on! Thank you.
Thank you for this very important information... I'll start the soft map towards the end of the month because I won't be able to be consistent for all 4 weeks before then... however, my main problem is the 3 work shifts, sleep quality is unfortunately poor having to change habits every week... since I can't avoid this problem, I'll commit more to the other components...
Thank you so much, Oliver! Your advice is clear and valuable. My life has changed since I’ve been following you and your dear mother. Franca
Hi Franca, I'm glad the article was helpful 🙂
Thank you for the valuable advice; it's very comforting to find someone who truly helps you understand where the problem originates.
Until I was 21, I weighed around 48 kg for 162 cm. Then, due to family, a hectic life, etc., I found myself at 40 years old weighing 85 kg.
I promised myself that starting in 2026, I'll start over with myself, but it's difficult...
A huge thank you for your outreach. I've already put it into practice since I've been following Dr. Tomasi. You are formidable, thank you for everything.
Thanks from the heart, Oliver
Thank you, Dr. Tomasi and Oliver
I've put many of your tips into practice and found them to be very helpful.
I always read you, and I've gotten to a good point
Thank you, Doctor, as always.
I will put it into practice.
Reading it, I feel I can better understand my body, poor thing.
page
Thank you for sharing your knowledge, you are our salvation for health. 🍀💚
Thank you for your easy way of making us understand complex concepts. Excellent explanation and interesting observation.
Thank you, Dr. Oliver, for an explanation of concepts that I understand, finally. Now I understand what is happening to me. I wanted to know about the MAPs, when to take them and how many. I think I will take them given my situation. I am already taking multi-mag and B-complex vitamin, which help me.
Thank you, I always read your emails that I find useful and they help me to understand and be able to choose.
Dear Oliver, you're very good at making difficult and complicated concepts understandable. Thank you! I will try to put your advice into practice. Your mom can be proud of you; after all, “the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.”.
Warm greetings
Silvana
Silvana, I truly thank you from the bottom of my heart for your wonderful words.
Thank you, Oliver.. I am already following the mom successfully.. thank you for all the interesting things you write.
Thank you for reading them 🙂
Thank you, no one has explained it to me like this before! Finally, an effective and efficient explanation. I've signed up for SMD, let's see if I can make my body understand that it can relax and start repairing again, and that the time for defense is over.
Bravo, Terry. Rest assured that your body also wants to be well: it wants to shed excess weight, it wants to increase strength and endurance, it wants to be full of energy and vitality, so we need to find a way to work together with our body and biology, and then it will seem like everything works “automatically.”.
Thank you Oliver, beautiful and scientific concepts. They are a real emotional and psychological support.
Thank you Oliver, everything is clear and exhaustive, and a special thank you also to your mom, whom I follow on social media and who is helping me with her advice.
Oliver
Finally, someone who clearly states that if overweight people don't lose weight, it's not a lack of willpower! Thank you for the detailed and clear explanations and simple advice. Tiziana
Thank you Oliver,
You discuss even the most abstract concepts divinely!! This collaboration with the charismatic and very professional Dr. Tomasi is fantastic. Heartfelt congratulations, Cristina E.
Very interesting indeed!
But I would have many questions for Dr. Tomasi.
I arrived too late to sign up for the SOFT MAP DIET.
But I would really like to be able to speak with the doctor.
Thank you very much
Claudia Ceroni
I wish to thank you, Oliver,
for the valuable information.
I've been following his mom for a while.
My health has improved.
I hope you reach more and more people. Grateful for what you do.
Excellent Cristina, great explanation.
Thank you, Mr. Oliver, to you and your mother Cristina, for all the information. I have been seeing you since approximately 2010 and am very happy. Last week, the secretary told me to call back in September for a general check-up. Fortunately, I am not in a hurry. Kind regards, Hilda Plattner Tomasi